Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
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He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
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I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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