One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im part way to drunk.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize