She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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