And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I understand Curling. That high.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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