Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
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