She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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