Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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