i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
We need a shit load of segways right now
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
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