I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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