There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
