The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
