porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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