he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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