TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
