Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
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