you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
