y did u give ur computer a hand job?
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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