Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize