My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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