I think im going to throw up on grandma
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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