I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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