shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
