he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I deserve this hangover.
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