Sponge bath it is.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
