Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
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I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
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Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
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