Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
just tell him i said nine months
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
