No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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