Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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