You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
