After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
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So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
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Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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