Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
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We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
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Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
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