only if we run a train.
done.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
It's rum buckets o'clock
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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