You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize