But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
