Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I'm always down for nudity.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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