they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
We have started to decorate penises.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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