Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
