is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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