Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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