She went from zero to smokin in five shots
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
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I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
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I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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