Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize