i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
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THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
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I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
and you fell through a lawn chair
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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