i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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