She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
