i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
