I puked a lego.
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Man, jail baloney is awful.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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