Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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