the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
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she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
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