I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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