I want to stick my p in your. b.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
